Islam Question and Answer - It is haraam for a man to be alone with his fiancée or kiss her

It is haraam for a man to be alone with his fiancée or kiss her

I hope that you can explain the following to me: does kissing the cheeks between an engaged couple mean that they must do the greater purification (ghusl)? What is the case if that is on the mouth?


 Does the latter invalidate wudoo’ in the case of a married couple?.

 

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

A man and
his fiancée are not married, rather she is still a “stranger” (non-mahram)
to him until the marriage contract is completed. Based on this, it is not
permissible for him to be alone with her or to travel with her, or to touch
her or kiss her. No one should take this matter lightly, because the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If one of you were
to be stabbed in the head with a needle of iron, that would be better for
him than touching a woman who is not permissible for him.” Narrated by
al-Tabaraani from the hadeeth of Ma’qil ibn Yasaar (may Allaah be pleased
with him); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami
(5045). 

Concerning
the ruling on touching one’s fiancée or being alone with her, al-Zayla’i
(may Allaah have mercy on him) said: It is not permissible for him to touch
her face or hands – even if there is no fear of desire – because she is
still haraam for him and there is no need for that. End quote from Radd
al-Muhtaar ‘ala al-Durr al-Mukhtaar (5/237). 

Ibn Qudaamah
said: It is not permissible for him to be alone with her because she is
still forbidden, and Islam does not allow anything but looking, so she
remains forbidden for him. And because if he is alone with her there is no
guarantee that something haraam will not happen. The Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man is alone with a woman but the
Shaytaan is the third one present.” And he should not look at her with
pleasure and desire, or in a dubious manner. End quote. 

The
Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) warned us against
being alone with a non-mahram woman, and said: “No man is alone with a woman
but the shaytaan is the third one present.” Narrated by Ahmad, al-Tirmidhi
and al-Haakim; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’
(2546). 

Secondly: 

With regard
to the greater purification (ghusl) being required because of kissing, that
is not the case. Rather the greater purification is required if maniy
(semen) is emitted or if intercourse takes place. This has been discussed in
the answer to question no. 7529. 

Thirdly: 

With regard
to wudoo’ being broken by touching a woman, this has been discussed in
question no. 2178. 

And Allaah
knows best.

Islam Q&A